I'm going through one of those seasons in my life where everything changes constantly.
Lately I've noticed such a weird change in friendships and the circles of friends that are ours in our lifetime. This is an area of constant change in my life at the moment.
The cycle of the friendship circle is such a bizarre and interesting concept.
I was just part of a wedding yesterday which was beautiful, but the friendship thing interested me. I was the maid of honour for an old friend from high school and i finished high school 12 years ago, so to be part of that ceremony was beautiful on so many levels. For the most part of the night I hung out with my best friend from high school who was also invited to the wedding and it was so good to catch up with her. The last time i saw her was two years ago at our 10 year reunion. It was a good feeling to know that even though we hadn't seen each other for 10 years, our friendship is so strong that it seemed like yesterday we were still driving down the main street of our town blaring music from our car and ordering all the junk food and movies we could find!!! Good times but so many more to be had.
Then after the wedding i chilled with another friend who i've only known for 7 months, a relatively new friend.
I have yet another friend who i don't see too much at all these days and yet used to spend quite a lot of time with.
The topic of friendships is something my brain tries to comprehend and to make sense of and yet i just can't seem to understand how it works.
Every once in a while i think about 80, 90 year old people and my mind starts reeling! I think about the friends i've had in my life and the friends i will have and the dramas, joys and sorrows that go along with that. It makes me feel so overwhelmed. I can't even comprehend their lives!
Imagine getting to be an old person, 80 or 90, imagine all the life experiences you'd have, the people you'd outlive. Imagine getting to that age and making a new friend - it's crazy!!! And then still yet, imagine still having a best childhood friend still alive with you.
I think about marriage and love and how you invest your whole being into one person for however many years and then i think about losing that person either through divorce or through death and how lost and lonely people must feel.
Old people must have so many stories and so many experiences, they too were young once, they made the same mistakes we all experience at some point. They weren't always old and forgetful.
I just sometimes wonder who the next lot of friends i'll have will be. Who are the ones i'll remember and who will i forget?
It's hard enough comprehending things like this in life. Heck, it's hard enough trying to comprehend being 80 or 90 years old and should we even look that far ahead anyway? So to try and comprehend something like eternity, is a complete impossible task.
This probably doesn't make sense, i just kinda typed out things that were going through my mind, which i occasionally do. I think i'd make a good candidate for psych school students!
=)
NB: This was a draft i found in my blogs - i have no idea why i didn't post it!
